The emotional choice + the practical choice can be the same thing. Let’s figure out what yours is.
This is one of the biggest “either way is right” decisions in wedding planning. And somehow it still makes couples spiral. So let’s make it simple:
A first look is seeing each other before the ceremony.
An aisle reveal is seeing each other for the first time at the ceremony.
Here’s how to decide.
It’s private.
No 150 people staring at your face while you cry (unless you want that). The moment is just yours.
It calms nerves.
After a first look, most couples go into the ceremony feeling grounded and excited — not shaky.
It helps your timeline.
You can do:
couple portraits
wedding party photos
even some family photos
before the ceremony, which frees up cocktail hour.
You get more daylight portraits.
Especially in fall/winter. The sun goes down fast, friends.
It’s classic.
If you’ve always imagined the “walk down the aisle, lock eyes, lose it” moment — that’s valid.
It’s a shared emotional high.
Your people get to experience that moment with you.
It can feel more “real-time.”
Some couples love waiting because it makes the ceremony feel like the true beginning.
If you skip a first look, you’ll need:
more portrait time after the ceremony
a longer cocktail hour (or less time for pictures)
strong sunset planning if you want golden hour
If you do a first look, you’ll need:
an earlier start time
a plan for where it happens (quiet + good light)
Pick based on how you want to feel, not what you “should” do.
Ask yourselves:
Do we want privacy or a big audience for that first moment?
Will seeing each other early ease our nerves — or spoil the magic?
Do we care about using cocktail hour for photos, or for mingling?
What does daylight look like at our ceremony time?
Pro tip: If you’re stuck, do a “first touch” instead.
You hold hands around a corner and read letters without seeing each other. You get emotion, privacy, and still save the aisle moment.